How can you best handle frustration when driving?

You’re finally heading home after a long, exhausting day. All you want is to kick off your shoes, eat something warm, and relax. But instead, you hit bumper-to-bumper traffic. Again. The light turns green, and nobody moves. The driver ahead is checking their phone. Someone behind you is tailgating, and you can feel your stress levels rising. Sound familiar?

You’re not alone. Many drivers have experienced moments like this, where a mix of stress, impatience, and external chaos starts to boil over behind the wheel. In fact, according to Global News, road rage is on the rise in Canada, with 83% of Canadians saying they have witnessed road rage over the past year.

If you find yourself getting frustrated on the road, this article is for you. We’ll break down the common causes of aggressive driving and explore the hidden risks of driving while frustrated. More importantly, we’ll share practical tips to help you stay calm and in control.

Why frustration happens on the road

Driving is often a test of patience, especially in large urban areas like Toronto or Calgary. Understanding the psychological triggers behind road rage can help drivers manage stress and maintain composure behind the wheel. What causes driver frustration? Key takeaways:

Displaced aggression or anger

We’ve all had days when everything seems to go wrong. Maybe a rough meeting at work, a fight with a loved one, or just general burnout. The problem is, those feelings don’t magically disappear when you buckle up and hit the road.

According to psychologists, this is a classic case of displaced aggression. Instead of confronting the actual source of our stress (like your boss or your to-do list), we unknowingly redirect it onto easier, more immediate targets, like the driver who didn’t signal or the person going 5 km/h under the limit.

Research indicates that stress from unrelated areas of one's personal life can manifest as aggression on the road. This phenomenon, known as displaced aggression, involves redirecting frustration toward uninvolved parties, in this case, other drivers.

Illusory superiority

Have you ever thought to yourself, “Everyone here is driving like an idiot… except me”? You’re not alone. This thinking taps into a common psychological bias called the illusion of superiority, where people tend to overestimate their own abilities compared to others.

A study in the Journal of Traffic Psychology and Behaviour found that most drivers think they’re better and safer than everyone else on the road. But having this mindset can backfire fast. When another driver cuts them off, speeds past, or tailgates, it feels like a personal challenge. That false sense of confidence can trigger aggressive reactions because they believe they’re in the right and more skilled than the other guy.

In fact, a 2024 survey by Pollara Strategic Insights found that nearly two-thirds (64%) of Canadian drivers admit to engaging in at least one anger-inducing driving habit, and of those, those who consider themselves "above average" drivers were even more likely to admit to such behaviours (68%).

This bias makes us more judgmental on the road, as well. When another driver makes a mistake, we’re quick to label them careless or dangerous. But when we make a mistake, we excuse it: “I was distracted,” “That wasn’t my fault,” “It was just one time.” This disconnect fuels impatience, anger, and, ultimately, risky behaviour. The truth is, everyone makes mistakes behind the wheel. If we remember that, we’re more likely to stay calm and less likely to escalate tense driving situations.

Common triggers of driving stress

Common triggers while driving can also fuel frustration:

• Traffic congestion

• Aggressive driving by others

• Running late

• Feeling out of control

• Slow drivers in the left lane

• Unexpected delays

• Weather conditions

The consequences of driving while angry

Driving while angry or frustrated isn't just a bad mood; it’s a safety hazard. When emotions run high behind the wheel, they can cloud judgment and lead to impulsive, risky behaviours like speeding, tailgating, or weaving through traffic.​

According to a study by EKOS Research Associates from Transport Canada, 47% of Canadian drivers identified speeding as a major cause of serious traffic collisions, while 41% pointed to driver distraction. These behaviours are often exacerbated by emotional distress, leading to aggressive driving patterns. But driving while angry doesn’t just make for a stressful ride. It can have serious, long-term consequences. Below, we break down the consequences of driving when angry:

Collisions and fatalities

According to Transport Canada, there were 108,552 injuries and 1,931 fatalities from motor vehicle collisions in 2022. One of the top contributing factors was speeding or driving too fast for the conditions, which accounted for 21.9% of fatal crashes.

Frustration often fuels this kind of behaviour. Whether it’s tailgating someone who’s “too slow” or weaving through traffic to “make up time.” It’s easy to think those split-second decisions won’t matter, but they often do. And even if an angry outburst behind the wheel doesn’t end in a crash, it can still cost you.

Insurance premiums

Aggressive driving, like excessive speeding, road rage incidents, or reckless driving manoeuvres, can lead to:

• Traffic tickets

• Demerit points

• Licence suspensions

• Increased insurance premiums

Most insurance providers in Canada take your driving record seriously. If you’re found at fault in a collision or have a pattern of violations, you could see your rate spike significantly. A single road rage incident can also follow you for years on your driving history.

In some provinces, serious infractions may even impact your ability to renew your licence or qualify for standard car insurance coverage. You could be forced into a high-risk insurance pool with fewer options and much higher rates. Drivers with a poor record may pay hundreds to thousands more per year in premiums. To learn more about how frustrated driving can affect your insurance premiums, reach out to a BrokerLink advisor.

Ten tips to help you stay calm and drive safer

There are many valid reasons for someone to be frustrated, but that is never an excuse to endanger yourself and your fellow drivers by driving erratically. To help you keep your road rage in check, we have put together the following list of expert tips from our advisors at BrokerLink for handling frustration when driving:

1. Recognize what is and is not within your control

• You’re running late and get stuck behind someone going 10 kilometres under the speed limit. You feel your blood pressure rising.

One of the biggest triggers for frustrated driving is feeling powerless, like you’re stuck in traffic with no way out or dealing with drivers who don’t follow the rules.

Pause and remind yourself: I can’t control them, but I can control how I react. Take a deep breath. Focus on your own safety and arrive when you arrive. Even saying this out loud can help defuse tension.

2. Drive defensively

• You spot someone weaving between lanes ahead. Rather than trying to pass or “teach them a lesson,” you slow down and give them space.

Defensive driving isn’t just a set of driving skills; it’s a mindset of patience and preparedness. Things to keep in mind when driving defensively:

• Maintain a safe following distance

• Adjust your speed according to conditions

• Stay alert for sudden movements

• Anticipate other drivers’ mistakes

Pro tip: Consider enrolling in a defensive driving course. It can lower your stress and potentially your insurance premiums. Contact BrokerLink to learn more.

3. Adjust your expectations before you drive

• You check your usual 20-minute route, and Google Maps shows 35. Instead of panicking, you take a deep breath and say, "Okay, looks like I’ll need to plan for a little more time today."

Most frustration comes from unmet expectations. If you expect a quick, smooth commute and get stuck behind construction, you’ll be annoyed. But if you expect potential slowdowns, you’ll be mentally ready for them. Whenever possible, start your trip five to ten minutes earlier to leave enough time if you run into an unexpected delay.

4. Use navigation apps to avoid triggers

• You’ve been burned before by an unexpected lane closure. Now, you check the app before every trip, and it saves you 15 minutes by rerouting.

Modern navigation apps like Waze, Google Maps, or Apple Maps don’t just help you get to your destination; they can alert you to traffic jams, construction zones, and car accidents in real time. So, set up traffic notifications on your preferred app. Glance at the map before starting your engine. It can help you avoid known frustration zones.

5. Create a calming environment in your car

• Instead of tuning into a high-energy talk show that raises your stress, you switch to a mellow playlist or podcast.

Just like you might set the mood at home with lighting or music, you can do the same in your car. Make a “calm drive” playlist. Include calming music artists or genres like reggae, classical, or lo-fi beats; whatever soothes you. Keep water, a favourite coffee, or a calming scent (like lavender) handy, too.

6. Practice deep breathing exercises

• You feel your heart rate climbing after a driver cuts you off. Instead of reacting, you inhale deeply through your nose, hold it, and exhale slowly.

When you're angry, your breathing becomes shallow and your body kicks into fight-or-flight mode. One way to combat this is to breathe differently on purpose. Try the “4-7-8” method while driving:

• Inhale for 4 seconds

• Hold for 7 seconds

• Exhale slowly for 8 seconds

Repeat 3–5 times to calm your nervous system. Practicing simple breathing techniques can help you stay calm, manage frustration, and keep a clear head while behind the wheel.

7. Pull over if you’re overwhelmed

• You’re shaking with anger after a driver nearly sideswipes you. Instead of venting by driving recklessly, you pull into a parking lot and give yourself a minute.

Sometimes, frustration hits hard; maybe after an intense day or a scary near-miss accident. If you feel out of control emotionally, it’s okay to pull over safely and take a break. Stretch your legs and try some anger management techniques to help you relax, like deep breathing. Then, restart when you’re ready.

8. Don't take other drivers’ actions personally

• Someone speeds past and gestures at you. Instead of engaging, you shrug it off and think: "They’re probably just having a bad day."

Many drivers assume bad driving is intentional, like someone cutting them off on purpose. But often, it’s not about you at all. Adopt a mantra: “It’s not personal.” Repeat it when you feel yourself getting worked up. Practicing empathy, even for rude drivers, can help reduce your stress.

9. Use your commute for mental wellness

• You listen to a guided meditation or an audiobook while stuck in traffic. Instead of stewing, you end up feeling more relaxed by the time you arrive.

Rather than seeing driving as a chore, treat it as “me time.” Try mindfulness apps like Headspace or Calm during your drive. Look for audio-based guided sessions designed for commuters.

10. Reward calm driving habits

• You stayed calm in stop-and-go traffic all week. On Friday, you grab your favourite coffee or treat as a reward.

Our brains respond well to rewards. If you’ve handled a tough drive without getting upset, give yourself credit or even a treat. Set a weekly intention, such as: “This week, I’ll focus on staying patient.” Track your progress. Celebrate when you succeed, even in small ways. Over time, you’ll train your brain to associate calm driving with positivity, improving your own driving habits.

Recognizing the early signs of aggression in yourself and others when driving

Road rage doesn’t always start with shouting or honking. It often builds slowly, beginning with feeling frustrated or impatient. Learning to recognize the early signs can help you hit pause before things spiral.

Signs in yourself

Early frustrated driving signs you might notice in yourself include:

• Tightening your grip on the wheel

• Clenching your jaw

• A racing heart

• Obsessing over how others are driving

Maybe you're even muttering under your breath or thinking about “getting back” at a rude driver. These small cues are your body’s way of telling you to slow down.

Signs in others

Common red flags in aggressive drivers include:

• Aggressive tailgating

• Speeding

• Weaving through traffic

• Making rude gestures

• Swearing or yelling

If another driver seems angry, the best thing to do is avoid eye contact, don’t respond, and give them space. Escalating the situation can quickly make things more dangerous.

What to do if you are the victim of a road rage incident

While this article mainly focuses on managing your own frustration, being on the receiving end of someone else’s road rage can feel even more stressful, and sometimes, even scary. If you’ve just had an encounter with an angry or aggressive driver, here’s what we recommend:

First, stay calm

It’s tough, but reacting emotionally will only make things worse. Avoid making eye contact, shouting, or using rude gestures. Angry drivers aren’t thinking clearly, so trying to “teach them a lesson” will likely just escalate things.

Next, give them space

Let them pass you if they’re tailgating. Don’t speed up to get away, weave through traffic, or try to block them. The best thing you can do is focus on driving safely and not engaging.

If you feel threatened or unsafe

If you ever feel threatened by another driver, here’s what to do to stay safe:

• Stay in your car and keep the doors locked

• Call the police if you can

• Use your horn or lights to draw attention

• If you believe you are being followed, head to the nearest police station or a busy, well-lit place with lots of people around—don't drive home

Above all, remember that your safety is more important than your pride. Just let them go. You’ll get to your destination in one piece and with your peace of mind still intact.

Contact BrokerLink for more tips on handling frustration when driving

Want to learn more about aggressive driving, how to stay calm behind the wheel, or what to do if frustration takes over? Reach out to BrokerLink—we’re here to help. As one of Canada’s leading insurance brokerages, we’re happy to answer all your driving and car insurance questions.

Need help finding affordable auto insurance? We’ve got you covered. If emotions ever run high and things go sideways on the road, you’ll want to know you’re protected. We also help with car insurance renewals, and we’re full of tips on how to save on your insurance premiums, like taking a defensive driving course.

You can reach us by phone, email, or in person at any one of our locations throughout Canada. No matter how you choose to get in touch, a BrokerLink insurance advisor will be happy to assist you. We also encourage you to take advantage of our free online quote tool that can provide you with a competitive quote in minutes.

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Car insurance FAQs

If I install winter tires on my car, will I receive a car insurance discount?

Depending on where you live in Canada, outfitting your car with winter tires could result in a car insurance discount of anywhere from 5% to 10%. Just make sure that your tires and the dates you have them installed and removed meet the conditions stipulated by your insurance company.

What is a high-risk driver?

A high-risk driver is an auto insurance policyholder guilty of the following: They have made too many insurance claims, they have had their policy cancelled due to non-payment, or they are at higher risk of a collision due to their driving records. Not all insurance companies offer policies for high-risk drivers, but an insurance broker can help you find an insurer that does.

How do I receive a multiple-vehicle car insurance discount?

The way to receive this type of car insurance discount is by purchasing car insurance for more than one vehicle at a time. This discount is ideal for households with two or more vehicles. If you bundle multiple insurance products together, you can save anywhere from 15% to 20% per policy. Plus, you will only have one renewal date to remember, which makes it more convenient for everyone involved.

What is all perils insurance?

All perils insurance is an option you will have, whether you are purchasing an auto, home, or commercial insurance policy. In the context of auto insurance, all perils coverage is available as part of the comprehensive coverage portion of your policy. When you select all perils coverage, you and your car will be protected against the widest possible list of risks. The exact perils covered by all perils insurance vary from policyholder to policyholder and even between insurance companies, but typically the following are included:

• Fire/lightning

• Windstorm

• Hail

• Theft

• Vandalism / mischief

• Falling objects

• Weight of ice, snow, sleet

• Freezing

• Damage from electrical current

How can I get cheap car insurance?

Finding cheap car insurance might seem impossible, but it’s far from it when you work with an insurance broker. An insurance broker can let you in on some of the best-kept secrets in the industry for saving money on car insurance. For example, they can inform you about bundling, winter tire discounts, anti-theft device discounts, safe driver discounts, telematics discounts, and more. A broker can also provide you with a free insurance quote.

Why is third party liability coverage so important?

Third party liability coverage is vital for all drivers in Canada. In fact, it’s important for almost any kind of insurance policy in Canada. Why does it matter for drivers? It comes down to the fact that this is the main type of coverage that can protect you if you get into an at-fault accident. An at-fault accident is one that you are liable for, or at least found to be more liable than the other person involved. Car accidents are costly and will be even more so without liability insurance. That is why this type of coverage is a requirement for all drivers, no matter where they live in Canada. This kind of coverage can protect you from third party lawsuits alleging bodily injury or property damage, and can help pay for medical fees, vehicle repair costs, and settlement and defence fees.

For related articles, check out our tips for winter car maintenance and safe long distance drive.